Im gonna call it Larry
After angering a small coven of vampire drug dealers on the outskirts of Seattle, Bloodedge wakes up to a call from his former land lord. Apparantly, the land lord was rather upset that there was now a very much dead body in his building and demanded that Bloodedge come to clean it up and deal with the problem. Bloodedge, the naive street samurai, hopped onto his brand new bike and started the drive out to his former place of residence. On the way he decides to call Ryan, the terribly kind mormon assassin who lives above him, asking him to check in on his place to clean it up before he gets there.
Ryan, the neighborly mormon, slips on a stealth suit and slips down into the room, to find 3 vampires staring at him in slight astonishment. The vampires quickly assume that he is there to do something of the body, ahem bodies. Ryan notices that his landlord is now dead and in addition, so is Rashid the simple ex-blt addict taxi driver that drove them to safety from the vampires. “So, whats goin on guys?” Ryan says attempting to be calm and talk his way out of the situation. “Your, associate, killed one of our best pushers. This angered me.” the 3rd vampire began to explain, in an obviously evil british accent. The most terrifying thing about him though was the fact that while the two accompanying him were brandishing assault rifles with swords at their sides, he had no obvious weapons. Wizard. “I did not think that he would actually be stupid enough to come, let alone send one of his friends to clean it up. So what you’re going to do is tell him to go to the Coffee Peddler, make up whatever lie you need to without alerting him as to our presence, and keep him there until we can pick him up. Understood?” Michael slowly explained.
Ryan, now wishing he could curse, immediately called Bloodedge. “Hey Bloodedge, whats goin on buddy?” “Oh just on my way back to the apartment to clean up, how bad is it?” “Pretty bad but I took care of it. I need you to meet me at the Coffee Peddler, now. I have mission vital information that I need to share with you.” “Did you talk to Chains?” “Yes, he’s the one that gave me the information to give to you. It is extremely important to the job, so we need to meet there asap.” “Are you sure? Should I call chains?” “What? No. Chains gave me the information to give to you, so you don’t need to call him.” “Yeah but I really think I should call chains.” “No! Do not call chains, he’s still coming down from the 4 kilos of coke you guys brought him.” “Fine, but you sure the place doesn’t need more help?” At this point, Michael begins to laugh hysterically, having overheard the entire conversation. “Yes! It is fine just meet me at the coffee peddler as soon as you can, ok?” “Alright man, I’ll call longshot too.” “What?! No! Don’t
--” the line suddenly goes dead as Bloodedge hangs up. Michael, appearing almost winded from laughter, “You know, I was thinking we’d kill you too, but now I’m in too good of a mood. So scurry back up to your apartment and we will not have a problem.” Ryan breathes easily, and begins to go back to his home.
Now, this is a low income neighborhood, not so low as to be a hell pit but low enough to have very thin walls and even the floors could be heard through. Ryan was far too nervous from his previous encounter to take this fact into consideration. So as soon as he got back up to his room, before the a vampires had even left the one right below him, he called bloodedge back and told him it was a trap. Michael smiled a bit before getting all of his men out of the room.
Meanwhile Bloodedge had called longshot and was telling her to go to the coffee pedler. “Fine but youre buying me a biscati.” she hung up saying. Getting her coat and assault rifle ready she left the house to listen to some details. Bloodedge, looking down at his phone and realizing Ryan was calling him decided to answer. “DO NOT GO TO THE COFFEE HOUSe!!! It Is a trap. There are vampires wanting to kill you there and if you go there you will be——(BOOM)” the line went dead.
Ryan sat in his hallway wondering what went wrong in his life. He was a good mormon, never drank, never smoked, never even a curse word. But for some reason, he’d just had plastic explosives destroy everything beneath, to the side of, and seemingly inside of him. He thanked God the moment before he passed out, hoping he’d wake up in the loving arms of Doc Wagon.
Bloodedge, not to be deterred by the explosion he heard, continues on to his old aparment. He narrowly beats his way through into the terrorist incident and makes his way for the stairs. As he turns to his left, he notices a man with extremely pale skin and a far too large gun aiming at him and smiling. With his last action, he calls Longshot and tells her the coffee house is a trap. Only the heavy lining of his jacket stopped the bullets from tearing him into hamburger and instead into a cold piece of meat.
“The fuck is goin on? I just go to get a biscati and everyone starts dying.” Longshot had already heard about the explosion over at Bloodedges old place and knew Ryan lived there. Figuring Ryan was probably dead and Bloodedge soon to join him, she ran back as fast as she could home, but stopping only once to get a biscati from some generic coffee house.
Lumen, thankfully unaware of any of these events, realized that she needed to find a way into the basment. She decided to mill around and make friends with her other coworkers, each of them in turn being drawn to her by the excited and beautiful face none of them had seen the likes of in years. She gracefully slided her way into talking to her manager, who seemed quite smitten with her. “Perhaps you’d like to go out, as friends, and talk some time away from everyone?” Lumen asked, hoping she could gather information from him. “Sure, sounds great.” Steven hastily replied, slightly confused that she had to add as friends yet remarkably excited he could enjoy this womans company for an evening.
Meanwhile in his dark hobo feared lair, DarkBeard begins the chanting necessary to summon and bind 2 spirits for use later.
Bloodedge wakes up in a dark featureless room, with the only source of light hitting him to blind him as to whats outside. A cool and casual voice begins to greet him “Heeeellllooo. I hope you dont mind the water, but you were sleeping a bit too much and we’d rather have you alert. Shan’t let the day get away from us like that.” Bloodedge, meanwhile finds himself focusing on maintaining his fear, believing that they can sense it and that they will hunger for him even more upon smelling it. “What do you want from me?” “Oh we merely wish for you to complete a job for us. We can tell that you’re awakened, an adept if my taste says correctly. Losing your essence would most certainly have doubly negative effects on you. So we give you a choice. We need one of two people dead. We will be nice enough to leave you that choice as to whom you’re going to kill.” The Magister then takes out two photos from his pocket and shows Bloodedge one. In it a hair slicked young man in a very nice suit stands and smiles at the one taking the picture. “This is Kyle O’Mally. A prominent politician who looks like he might actually get to do something in the city. Unfortunately for him, he wishes to lower drug rate through the lower city, which as you could understand would hinder our sales. So kill him, and we let you live.” Bloodedge, not too keen on assassinating a politician, decides to ask who the other target is. “The other target is this man. I believe you’ve met him before.” The Magister hands him an old photograph of a man in crisp military haircut and tailored suit chatting on an expensive commlink, with the bored yet engaged look of a middle man executive. Instantly, Bloodedge realizes this is Chains hes looking at. “Ill take the politician.” Bloodedge quickly exclaims. “Good. We thought that would be the easier of the two. Now of course we wont be doing this on the honor system, but thankfully since you were carrying around 15k nuyen in your pockets we thought we’d buy you a nice little cranial bomb and collar to inform us of what you do.” After hearing this, Bloodedge quickly passes out from the love tap at the back of his head.
Waking up hours later with a massive headache at the back of his head, Bloodedge scrambles to get in contact with Longshot. “Dude, what the fuck happened? Where have you been?” “No time, just meet me at my place, ok?” “Gah, fine.” Minutes later, both are standing in Bloodedge’s new apartment as he panics. Reluctantly, he decides to tell Longshot everything that has occurred. “Are you fucking kidding me? You go back to your fire bombed apartment, nearly killed by a gunner, then get taken hostage by vampires who decide to implant a bomb in your skull, oh and the real treat, they can hear all of this?” “Yes….” “Hand me the monitor collar. Kinda surprised they havent blown it yet, but oh well. Hey, Vampires. Wanna make a deal? Ill take out the Politician for you and you can take the bomb out of my friends head, then if you have any other assasination jobs, just call me up. Hows that sound?”
Meanwhile, increasingly terrified at the situation vastly spinning out of control, Bloodedge whirls around and using his katana, cuts off his skull, with the cranial bomb lightly blinking on the inside. Before passing out, he laughs maniacally, and falls to the ground.
A panic ensued from Longshot, who before hanging up, asked the vampires to send her video if they got it. Taking a shot of drugs, she struggles desperately to keep him alive and decides to forfeit the docwagon contract she bought earlier that day to him, in order for him to live.